I have never really understood when i hear ppl say they want to be alone, when they go into moments of going off on their own. Cos even though i may be an introvert, i always feel like i need to have some form of companionship n i will reach out to ppl, even if i may not have been in contact with them for a while.

But now i tink i finally get it. Now i tink i noe y sometimes ppl juz feel like going off n find solitude. Away from other ppl. Initially i worry that im turning anti-social, that im turning into a recluse.

But now its like i juz had an epiphany. I realize now that all e while maybe i was running away from having to be alone n I was doing all sorts of things to make up for wad i perceived to be a state of loneliness. When i tink what i shd have done was to accept it and see it as an opportunity to self-reflect. To embrace being wif myself, without any other person to so-called keep me company. I have come to the conclusion that after reaching out so much to ppl, its time for me to voluntarily retreat from e company of other ppl. And spend time getting to noe the most important person who will always be wif me, no matter wad.

ME.

In fact, i tink im beginning to like it. I am slowly trying to know more abt myself, i tink i have taken the 1st step in understanding that there is a difference between solitude and loneliness.

(Solitude is the joy of being alone while loneliness is the pain of being alone)

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 9:41 PM

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I dont understand la some of these job ads.

They want ppl wif experience. But if we juz got out of poly, how to have e relevant experience dammit?

So wad are they sayin?tt fresh graduates stand little chance of getting a job issit? Den how are we ever gonna enter e job market if we dont possess the so-called experience they r looking for?

Aargh. so irritating.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 12:26 PM

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Wads up wif me n Farhans lately?

Knape la aku asyik kenal org nama farhan semenjak dua menjak ni?

If its nt farhans who wanna add me to their frenster list, its farhans i gotta noe from online who either juz re-entered my life or i juz baru kenal.

Bleah. Is Fate tryin to tell me something here?

On a different note.... i tot i wanna write abt sth but suddenly im out of words. haha. crap. sitting at home n nt using much of my brain matter has made it a lil rusty. pfft.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 9:30 PM

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You scored as Psychology. You should be a Psychology major! Psychology 75% Journalism 75% Anthropology 67% English 67% Sociology 58% Linguistics 58% Dance 50% Philosophy 50% Mathematics 50% Theater 50% Art 33% Engineering 33% Biology 25% Chemistry 8% What is your Perfect Major?) created with QuizFarm.com

I knew I wanna do psychology. Anyting to do with the study of human mind n behaviour fascinates me. Too bad i cant reali pursue that interest now at this point in my life. Maybe in the future, who noes.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 10:14 AM

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FOOD FOR THOUGHT.....

Why is doing anyting like a girl, a "bad thing", even if ure a girl?

Why arent blond men considered intellectually-challenged?

Why arent young men warned to watch out for dirty old women?

Why is there anti-cellulite cream but no anti beer-belly cream?

Why is a bachelor always eligible but a spinster never so?

How come only male TV hosts are allowed to be old and ugly?

If nice guys never get the girl, does that mean that all women are married to bastards?

Why is a man only interested in a woman until she is interested in him?


UPDATE on my Life (for those who care to noe haha)

Anw yea i got shortlisted further for the job interview i went to on Mon. It was quite a long process the whole ting. I reached there in the morning a lil late though at 825 when i was supposed 2b there at 815 am heh. but no worries, they didnt reali care.

I found out there were 2 other candidates who were there also. So in the morning, we were all given 3 tests, aptitude tests of sorts. the 1st 2 were summary-based. Brought me bek to my sec skl days when i had to do summary for the comprehension part in Eng exams seh haha. Was a lil rusty but i managed. The 3rd test was an IQ test which i answered miserably for e 1st 2 qns. well i didnt reali answered actuali haha. i juz crapped out some lines, all the while muttering to myself 'wad e hell is this,i dun understand a word of this qn. wad e heck, tink faai tink. ure a masscommer, crap ur way thru'. Wahahaha.

Den 3 of us went for lunch n aft tt was the interview round. didnt expect myself to be 1st so i was a lil surprised they called out my name to go 1st. And wad do u noe ? i got to the room and there were like 10 ppl in it. i was like 'whoa ok'. So i juz gave a hopefully wad was a winning smile n sat down, preparing for qns to be bombarded at me. actuali i tink it went well n i left a gd impression of them, if not they wont shortlist me further rite?

Anw it wasnt as tough as i tot it would be. mayb cos i reali2 prepared myself n did my homework. i even got them to laugh, dunno if its wif me or at me, haha. but i didnt care cos if they laughed, at least they will remember me for my humour n remember me better. anw there was a funny part during the interview when they asked if i have any qns to ask n i chirped in that i did have a whole list. it was juz in the other room n i forgot to take it wif me. And guez wad they ask me to do? to go n get it haha. i was like 'Reali?' oh ok'. And so i did. So i tink that was sth they will remember me for lol.

And yea well now i guez all i can do is hope n pray that i can get a job soon. If this one is for me, den all the better. Alhamdullilah. if it isnt, den im going to be patient n continue my job hunt. Anw wish me all the best heh

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 11:48 AM

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Wah 10 days since I last wrote an entry. Ppl keep tellin me to update. i didnt even realize peepz even bother to read this lil bloggie of mine haha

Anw yest i did tot of blogging but nothing reali wanna come out.

Hmm anw i got my MSN fixed. My home comp is FINALLY working n able to go to the internet. aft god noes how many mths. so yea tts gd. But surprisingly those few days tt i couldnt go to msn, i didnt experience withdrawal symptoms like i tot i would lol. Extreme case gitu eh, sampai nk withdrawal symptoms. but nola, there wasnt reali anyone i die2 wanna tok to online these days anyway.

Yea so on Mon Im gonna for an interview. Wish me luck. I reali2 wanna clinch a job soon. Its so early though. Can u imagine i have to be there at 8?

AAHHHH!! Im usually not even awake at that time hahaha. guez i have to drag my sleepy ass outta bed n sleep early on Sun nite. Oh ya n prep myself up for e interview on Sun. And the interview is gonna last the whole day cos im gonna have to go thru aptitude tests n all that.

InsyaAllah I will get a job sooooooon

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 12:00 PM

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I was in the middle of editing my resume to send to mtvasia for a job posn but i got tired of tinking wad to write so i decided to blog instead. seeing as how my blog is gathering dust, cobwebs, etc.

Anw yest i had a scare when my laptop cant even go to the internet for god noes wad reason. i was so farking pissed la cos if i couldnt go online to look 4 jobs, how am i supposed to get the job tt i desperately desperately need? n its nt like the newspapers are useful. all the job ads nt reali wad i want. but thankfully now i can.

the only problem is that for some other unknown reason, it cant go to MSN, Hotmail, and other websites that need signing in, like Mel. nt that i need to go to the NP's website anymore but my bro needs to and tts gonna be a problem.

But i wanna go MSN le. how am i supposed to keep in contact wif ppl n keep myself entertained if i cant tok to ppl online??

SOB SOB

I need ppl's company. Or i will experience withdrawal symptoms.

ANYONE out there noes how to fix this problem? Please please help me. Do i need to delete some cookies or sth? Im such a computer idiot i noe. bleah

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 11:44 AM

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LoveCynic
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