Sunday, February 29, 2004


was so lazy to go to cck juz now to top up my ezlink bus pass but since its gonna be a new mth tmr,my dad asked me to go so no choice la.anw at 1st sms seok fun but then she not free so i tot of rashidah.haha so long nvr see her,my old classmate from bp.anw she was free so since i didnt wanna go to cck alone,i asked her to hang out wif me.ya it was fun catching up on old times n reminiscing,i hope tts e correct spelling lol.
went to McD to eat 1st cos i was starving.after tt went ard lot1.aiyoh its been so long since ive been there,the last time was when i was still a bpian haha.those were e days.every day after skul lot1 will be e designated hang out place cos that's e onli shopping centre near e skul.haha till i was so freakin bored of e place.know it inside out.shidah later felt like eating candy floss so we ate n chat while goin to e new shops in lot1.
was jokin abt hw in this one shop,we were like followed by e shopkeeper or sth.me n shidah noticed it n were thinkin like aiyoh,this woman keep followin us ard 4 wad?think we cant afford e things issit?haha.then on e way home,tok abt our sec skul teachers like VLee,Salim,Aw,Saripah.haha its so funny goin bek down memory lane.abt how we use to tok bek to e teachers we hate or have a kind of a love-hate thing wif.we always purposely get on their nerves to irritate the hell out of them lol.then shidah reminded me abt how Aw,who was our form teacher,always startle the heck out of us whenever we were doin our tests by sayin his voice out loud like a loudspeaker from e bek of e class like 'Time's up' or 'Ten more mins'.all of us will always be like shit n pens will be flyin cos we were like so concentrated on doin e tests when suddenly this booming voice came out of nowhere to scare e wits out of us lol.we were both laughin n gigglin in e lrt juz now recalling all these memories haha.yup n yes,shidah i did say ur name so for once u'll be famous lol.so it's quite fun la goin out wif my old frenz.mayb when we r all free or sth,we can do it again another time.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 6:55 PM


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Saturday, February 28, 2004


felt kinda crappy last nite till i cried myself to sleep.damn hormones.nvm im alrite nw.stumbled upon this piece of writing my bro did 4 his hw or sth,it's titled someone who's ur source of inspiration.haha gues who's my bro was?moi!lol,awww isnt tt sweet?felt better after reading tt thing hehe tho of coz i dun think my bro would want me to noe cos it's too mushy n stuff haha.n juz nw,asked my lil sis to massage my shoulders cos i was feelin so tense.haha she's good u noe,considering she's onli 8.aaah im so lucky to have all these nice siblings haha though of coz we do have our share of fights but who doesnt rite?
anw e reason i felt like crap last nite n this mornin was cos i realized tt sometimes i say im practical n yet do stuff to e contrary,like make myself see things tt arent even there n delude myself.i was drowning in self pity haha.n was berating myself all nite.its so ironic.i hate it when ppl ard me put themselves down n yet i do e same to myself.note to self:practise wad u preach.but then i tot i shd cut myself some slack n nt be too hard on myself.after all if u dun treat urself wif respect,how do u expect others to do e same to u?oh well but 1 thing's 4 sure.i have seen e light,so to speak haha n will not be caught up in too much drama like in e past cos frankly,it juz drains my energy.nth big or sudden reali happened actuali,juz tt a lightbulb juz went off in my head i suppose.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 9:56 PM


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Thursday, February 26, 2004


had my iac juz nw at e salvation army at upper bt timah rd.my grp members tell me last min so had to cancel my plans to catch a movie.gues tts a gd thing in a way cos i wanna go watch a movie nx wk anw.ya the whole experience at the salvation army was kinda bleurk in a way cos for one thing,the stuff there is like so old n outdated:e clothes n toys n cds n god knows wad else kinda crap tt ppl dumped over there that it made me feel ancient haha.e ppl workin there also look like they r kinda weird.the woman had a voice tt seemed to be stuck on helium or sth,im nt being mean or anything but it's true.then e lady who told us like wad to do n stuff,was kinda bossy n make me roll my eyes in exasperation.the 1st thing tt she ask us to do was to like rearrange all these gazillion stuffed toys on these shelves.at 1st i was like ok,stuff toys r cute so ya,shdnt be too hard.but halfway thru,my nose was tickling cos of all e dust mites tt ive let loose wif all e rearranging.it was soo dusty,gosh.i was like ok,as soon as i reach home,im gonna go wash my face n clothes lol.then after tt,went to rearrange some ladies shoes or sth,aiyoh the platform shoes were like so heavy i dunno hw or why ppl would even wanna buy them.mayb to torture themselves haha.n its nt as if there were many to choose from.all were e same colour n e same size lol.then folded some jeans tt seemed kinda old n worn out,well it is e salvation army after all.but honestly i dunno who will buy clothes over there,mayb ppl on a very very tight budget haha.i even saw some wedding n prom dresses or sth from the olden days haha.which were all tacky.did abt 4hrs of iac juz nw so have to clock up like 6more hrs.gawd im gonna be so glad this is over.haiz juz wanna get all this over n done wif.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 6:59 PM


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Wednesday, February 25, 2004


juz nw went to Bodyworld at expo.i dunno how to describe e whole experience of lookin at all those dead bodies on display.several words come to mind...amazing....fascinating....disturbing....unsettling...disgusting....mind-blowing...
went wif ma close gerlfrenz,kin,syaz n nura.met them at wdls bus station n later took a bus to changi b4 takin e mrt to expo.we were like rushin from 1 place to another cos there's like a half price offer for those who come btw 10-12 so of coz since we dun wanna have to pay 18bucks,we rushed like mad n kept lookin at e time to see if we were late or not.reached expo ard 1150 n we tot ok,nearly there.then we saw we were at hall6 when e exhibition is at hall 1.we were all like oh gosh have to run like mad.then outside there was this guy who waved at us or sth.he was on this like little trolley van,u noe those kinda vehicles u see ard NP sometimes where those guys who r lazy to walk get to use to go up n down e hill.those kind of vehicles,dunno wad they r called la.anw he offered us a ride to hall1 n we were like reali?ok great haha.so with onli like 5 mins to go b4 12,the guy took us to hall 1 which was like soooo bloody far from where we were originally at.thank goodness we get 2 hitch a ride.if nt,we'd have been late n would have to pay $18 instead of onli 9bucks.whew hehe.
aniwaez so in we go.went ard e various exhibits...there's like so many of them in various poses...playing chess...throwing a javelin...thinkin...n there were even animal bodies on display like a horse n camel.n e gross thing was e slicing n dicing of e whole body. i mean seeing all the sliced parts reminded me of those meat u see at e butcher shop or supermarkets at e meat section.all cut in neat little slices.but e sad part was e foetuses on display at different stages of e pregnancy.started from like 3wks to 7mths.cant believe we all started so tiny.they even had these babies tt had defects like without a skull n like a protruding nose or sth.very sad actuali thinkin abt it.kinda inhumane i think to set them on display like tt.felt kinda bored after a while.
then me n kin saw some comment books where visitors can go n write down their comments.haha this was e funny part.had a riot laughin our heads off at some of e comments we read in e bks.got this 1 guy from indonesia write sth in there but his english is all broken.lol kin was imitating hw it would have sounded like n she sounded so hilarious. we were like laughin n laughin non-stop haha.then got this comment by this 9yr old boy who said it was a lil smelly hahaha.also got this ah-beng,well i infer tt he's an ah beng la judging from his eng.he was like rantin on abt how sick n a waste of money it was to go there n was like wa lao ai all e way lol.funny ah all these comments.there was even this pompous doctor.aiyoh he even mentioned tt he have a PHD.like big deal,he was sayin tt all the bodies didnt even faze him cos he saw more disgusting bodies in his line of work.hah so wad?y e heck did u come in e 1st place?idiotic la,waste his own money.haha it was weird,tt seemed to e e highlight of e whole thing when we actuali came to see e bodies in e 1st place.the bummer was tt we cant bring our cameras in so cant take pics.if nt,we would have snapped so many photos.seemed tt was a gripe wif other visitors too.they were complaining abt how e admission rate was so expensive n yet they cant bring cameras in.oh well too bad then.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 7:18 PM


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Tuesday, February 24, 2004


yest went to skul did marketing project but ended up didnt do much haha.in e end,went 4 lunch n tok crap 4 dunno hw long n decided to do e work at home or meet up online to discuss hehe.but it was fun so heck ah wif work.its e holidays anw so we r supposed to enjoy muahahaha.tmr gonna go to bodyworld at expo n see dead ppl lol.gonna take pics wif my frenz n corpses.cant wait hehe.then mayb after tt goin bugis to shop.its been sooo long since i shop.im deprived hahaha.but all my $$$ gonna run out,well nvm la,i can always earn them bek.
i think im becoming naughtier n badder(is there such a word?) by e day.sigh,sometimes i wanna be bad but then i noe i shdnt.damn.it's like i set double standards.i dun like ppl to do certain things to me n yet i do e same to ppl.i juz hope tt i dun get punished by God for it or sth,but if i do,well i deserved it i suppose.im tryin to repent now.haha hope my resolution last.InsyaAllah.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 12:58 PM


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Sunday, February 22, 2004


im such a sadistic bitch 4 taking pleasure in seeing other ppl in pain haha.especially if its ppl i dislike.well u cant blame me.who wouldnt take pleasure in seeing their enemy get their just rewards rite?lol.im evil yea2 wadever.but wad goes ard comes ard.i mean him,not me haha.who ask him 2b a jackass n lie to me?now he got a swollen cheek.i had a flitting thought to ask him if he's ok or not,then i tot to myself 'gerl,wad r u thinkin?dun waste ur sms on him' so nah y shd i?haha.gosh i dunno wad i ever saw in him but im glad im over tt phase.a gd fren told me tt when ure in love wif someone,u dun see all these things n ya i agree wif her.when it's over,then u see e light.n i wasnt even in love,yet i was blind to it.gues tts y they say love is blind.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 4:45 PM


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Thursday, February 19, 2004


today i shd be celebrating.i mean it's like e end of e wk oredi.well almost.tmr dun reali count cos i will onli come 2 skul for onli 3hrs.which at this moment in time im kinda reluctant to do cos i feel sick.juz nw in skul my right contact lens gave me trouble n my eye became all red n painful cos of tt.now i think the iris is a bit whacked or sth cos i can reali see clearly thru my right eye.e trouble started after radio.luckily it didt give me prob during e dub n splice test juz nw.if nt,i wouldnt be able to concentrate.got a B for tt so tts gd la i gues.aniwaez,when i was eating lunch,tts when it all started.then all thru socpsy,i was having difficulty opening my eyes n focusing on e discussion session n during e whole lesson my mind was elsewhere.in e end,took out the lens n asked mas to put it bek in 4 me cos im actuali nt quite adept at putting the lens in.well not expertly as i would hoped 4.decided 2 take a taxi home cos i dun think i can tahan waiting 4 e bus cos my eye was hurting bad.thank goodness brought xtra cash tt my granddad gave me in e morning.n i think im also falling sick cos im surrounded by ppl who r sick.as strong as my body resistance is,i think im experiencing some symptoms of flu.darn oh well at least i wont have to come to skul anw nx wk if i do fall sick,which is hopefully nt the case.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 7:21 PM


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Monday, February 16, 2004


last week b4 term break.YIPPEE!!I cant freakin wait!my body seriously needs some recharging,im so dead tired all e time n my mind & body r drained of energy.1st thing im gonna do during e break is to catch some much needed zzz.i soo need sleep badly.juz found out no writcomm tmr.YEA!!another cause 4 celebration!well im nt gonna get e grammar test tmr but then again i'd rather nt noe my marks anw or lack of it haha.ignorance is bliss i gues.
yest i did sth haha.i dun reali noe hw to describe it.ok i went to add this cute guy to my msn list.no big deal rite?onli thing is he doesnt noe me haha.actuali ive seen him ard in skul b4 n i knew his name cos my fren once pointed him out to me.then yest i was fiddling wif wilson's lappy n saw this nick on his list tt was kinda amusing.juz 4 fun,i asked him who has tt nick n when he told me,it registered in my mind tt this person is e guy i saw ard in skul b4.so me having nth better to do, took note of e email add n added e guy to my list of msn contacts. i'll juz call him S to make it easier aiight?haha.ok so later tt nite,S was online too n he msg me askin who am i.of coz i cant possibly tell him e truth rite?lol so i kinda told him a tinny lil lie hehe.juz hope he doesnt find out n it all backfires on me haha.aniwaez, predictably he was suspicious n kept askin qns like hw i get his add n all.but i think i managed to deflect n throw him off course la.hopefully.when i told my frenz,they had a whole list of rxns, from being amused to callin me a 'buaya' haha.which i hope was all done jokingly lol.oh well i mean to me,if u want sth,u gotta go after it.n see wad happens.if nth happen,then at least u noe u gave it a try instead of always wondering 'What if'. but i have a feeling this guy is gonna be quite hard to get to noe so it may be a challenge haha.tts ok onli time will tell.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 10:06 PM


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Thursday, February 12, 2004


haiz im soo tired n depressed n sick of the workload.i juz read my fren's blog n im happy 4 her.at least she's feelin much better nowadays.wads ironic is tt after readin her blog,i was e one feelin sad.dunno wads wrong wif me haha.mood swings.guess im juz feelin a lil jealous n left out cos im no longer as close as i once was wif my gd frenz.im so freakin exhausted nowadays.always catching some zzz in e bus be it on e way to skul or bek home.i wanna recharge during e weekend n 2 days r not enuf.how can it be enuf? i want to do my writcomm reaction paper n teach tuition n still have a gd rest?it all goes down to good time management i suppose though im nt very gd at tt.if nt,i wouldnt be like this haha.bah.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 6:48 PM


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Tuesday, February 10, 2004


AAAAHHH!!Cant wait 4 this freakin week 2b over!!man how come it seems like all e deadlines r like this wk?it's like for every day of this wk,there's sth tt needs to be completed.haha 4 those ignorant ppl out there who thinks tt masscommers r all glamour,hah,they r dead wrong.the workload keeps piling up like mad.but to be honest,if i can turn bek time,i still would have picked MCM lol.how ironic.oh well persevere gerl,this is onli e beginning of things to come.
dun reali think im gonna do tt 1000word long essay 4 writcomm.hopefully can finish my radio assignment by 2nite n do a bit of tt photoshop 4 webgraph.heck i'd forgotten how to use tt program.asked jer to teach me a lil juz nw to refresh my memory haha.cant believe it's oredi the 6th or issit e 7th wk?well wadever,in any case,it's gonna be like break in abt a wk or two.time sure passes by fast when ure as busy as a bee.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 6:03 PM


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Saturday, February 07, 2004


yest went to tt cambodia exhibition thingy.initially didnt feel like goin but since almost every1 decided to go,i tot wth n since im nt feelin very confident abt my grammar test,didnt see e harm in goin n knowing wads in store 4 me at e exhibition.asked syaz to go along wif me cos i didnt wanna be bored alone haha.but in e end,lisa followed me home from skul n later we went there 2gether along wif syaz.
reached e place n entered e area.took e qn paper n glanced thru e choice of qns.all which looked reali foreign to me,like they r written in some strange lang.i mean they were so chim n like wth?!hw the heck am i gonna choose n ans one of them,crappin 1000 words of bull****?!looked at all these pictures taken by this guy called alan lee.at 1st i was like erm,oook hw am i supposed to look meaningfully at all these pics?i was basically nt very willing 2b there n was juz lookin blankly at all of e photos.then syaz was tryin to encourage me to look at e pics n askin me to describe them to her so i can at least get an insight into e pics or sth.so i made weak attempts to reali look closely at them n tryin to look interested.mentally i was juz moanin my fate n calculating hw to spend my time doin e essay apart from all the other gazillion stuff i have to finish.then after makin 1 round thru e pics,i got out feelin rather blah.then syaz asked me a very interesting qn,one tt made me think.she wondered y issit tt all e masscomm students seem so jaded,n i was like but u dunno wad we're goin thru,the amt of work tt we have to get done.but later i tot 'yea,she does have a point.y do i seem so jaded?'somewhere deep inside i think i noe y but then again,i tot to myself i havent reali undergone thru so much to make me feel so cynical n skeptical of e world ard me.i dunno.mayb im juz a ur typical angsty,jaded teen who scoff at e stuff she sees ard her.mayb we all r.some juz hide it better than others,others show it.
but after hearing e speeches made by alan lee,n kon who to my surprise was like so emotional till he cried,wow imagine,kon of all ppl,cryin??well i gotta admit i feel blessed to be live in spore n have all the basic necessities n yet i complain,soundin so ungrateful sometimes.when i looked at e pics ,the children in Cambodia can still have wide grinning faces n they seemed so oblivious to their dismal surroundings.haiz oh well juz nw i was feelin a bit inspired enuf to start writin on tt essay,unfortunately tt feelin was fleeting.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 10:46 PM


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Thursday, February 05, 2004


haiz i feel so tired n sian.i dun think im eating rite.today alone all my meals were on e bus haha,both my breakfast n lunch.i was late 4 skul oredi so bought a filet o fish n munched it on e bus on e way to skul,then on e way home bought a teriyaki sandwich n ate it too in e bus.i noe i cant eat in e bus but i tot wth since i was so freakin hungry anw,i dun reali care.then on e way home,came across farhan n i accompanied him to buy cheese fries n i helped myself too la hehe.hope u dun mind An.
then my workload r like piling up.like b4 i have completed an assignment along comes another one.wa lau,n then the grammar test was like so freakin hard n e chances of passing r like very slim.there's this reaction paper i can do to get xtra credit juz in case my test is a big flop.but still wif the amt of hw i have,i doubt i can do the 1000word essay.but on e other hand,i can earn xtra marks.to do tt,i have to go to this exhibition tmr at stamford rd.to go or not to go?tt is e question.most prob i will go la but see 1st ah if i wanna do e essay,but then of dun do e essay,wads e pt in goin?lol dun mind me,im rambling to myself.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 7:38 PM


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Sunday, February 01, 2004


hmm been quite some time since i blogged.juz put in all these quizzes i did cos i was bored online even though i have tons of hw to do haha.
had an interesting convo wif sammie last nite.abt wad else tt gerls like to tok abt?GUYS of coz.cant live wif them,cant live without them.told her abt my recent experiences wif guys:the good,the bad n the ugly.gotta admit i still dun believe in love,all tt soulmate crap n love at 1st sight rubbish but tt dun mean i still dun like eye candy hahaha.n if guys show interest in u,especially if they r cute(i noe i sound so superficial but it'a human nature.anw beauty do lies in e eye of e beholder),i say y nt have some fun rite?lol.but honestly at this pt in time,i think it's juz better to have guys only as frenz n nth more cos anything more can get real complicated n messy.ive seen my gerlfrenz ard me get hurt n have their hearts broken by jerks who r such a**holes n in e end,i wonder issit reali worth it?dun get me wrong im nt like anti-love or anything,it's juz tt i dun reali see happy endings ard me except 4 those in fairy-tales n movies n well those r obviously fake fluff.oh well i dun reali care much abt this at this juncture in my life.skul definitely is no1 priority n besides im much too bz wif assignments n papers due tt my life revolve ard skul which is kinda sad reali haha.onli time will tell.wads meant to happen will happen n take its due course.sometimes when u least expects it...
on another note,today's hari raya haji n my dad brought home e meat from e mosque.n get this?he even took bek home e HEAD OF E FREAKIN SHEEP complete wif HORNS n everything!!!eurgh!totally gross.then my dad was like 'dismantling' it haha,gouging out e eyes n tongue n god knows wad else inside tt poor sheep's head.lol my mom even took a pic of my dad posing wif tt head wif her new camera fone.sadistic haha.my dad joked tt if we eat e eyes,our eyesight will have perfect vision again.lol wad crap.anw it's all cooked nw n they're gonna eat it later:eyes,tongue,n of coz e meat la.i will eat e meat,i juz wont touch e eyeballs n tongue.bleurk,disgusting!

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 7:32 PM


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