Man its been a LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG TIME since i last blogged in the online realm. due to several different reasons, this space on blogspot has been neglected n filled wif cobwebs. im nt exactly back again. im juz bored haha

anw its been a few mths now. Ramadhan's come n gone. Sadly i dun tink i have reali made full use of the holy mth. i hope that i can still see the nx fasting mth. InsyaAllah. Raya has arrived into its 2nd wk now.

*lapse of an hr plus*

haha i wrote e top part. went to other windows n completely forgot tt i was in the middle of blogging. den i got reali hungry so i went to eat. n den i remembered lol. how lame.

anw a lot of things have happened during my blogging hiatus. anw for those who have been asking me why i dun blog anymore n all, i didtn even realise ppl bother to read this lil entries of mine haha. anw im still workin at Mendaki, still temping there. still looking for a permanent, or at least a contract job that will give me stable income for a yr minimum. but that search has nt been in full force lately due to time constraints n post-work exhaustion.

in other news, yest was fun. raya outing juz 3 of us gerls was like a gerls day out so i had a blast. esp during e last part hehe. wont tell u wad it is but we went wild lol. we took our own sweet time at each hse. spent almost 2 hrs average each. cam whoring sessions a must of coz. i feel more like a narcissist every day haha. all in all, a day definitely well spent.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 10:04 PM

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yesterday didnt start out too well for me. firstly i was extra late for work. lucky 4 me my boss only came into e office like 10 mins after me. and a few steps away from my workplc, e strap of my shoe juz had to break off. leaving me having to hop on one foot and walking barefooted on the other into my office building. seriously put me in a bad mood n i stomped into e office n flung my shoes to the floor. yea i have a tendency to be violent when im pissed. thankfully i cooled down aft tt. had to wear slippers to bedok b4 buying a new pair of shoes and boarding the mrt home. there's no way im wearing the oversized slippers i usually wear in e office back home la lol.

so far, i cant fast yet. its tt time of e mth now.hope it wont last too long cos i reali want to fast and terawih. anw yest at work, i kept blowing my nose non-stop.my throat was itchy. kinda irritating. i hardly fall sick. ate some medicine last nite n suck on some lozenges. forgot to do that this morning though. yea n now my nose is blocked. bah.

anw last nite HADY WON!!WOOHOO!! haha i reali tot Jon was gonna win though. actuali no matter who won, as cliche as it sounds, both are gd. to be honest, all this while, i couldnt care less abt Sg Idol.tot it was a bunch of crap. well for the most part it still is lol. but i gotta admit i couldnt resist it n voted once for hady last nite.lucky my 60cents didnt go to waste. i heard that hady won by a landslide victory garnering 70% of e votes. frankly that was surprising. i had tot that it would only be a marginal difference between the both of them. ah well rumours abound that there's not gonan be anymore season aft this. im glad haha. spare our ears from having to listen to torturous wannabe singers like paul n joakim plz.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 10:06 AM

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alrite so yest i didnt go to work haah. actuali i had intended to go half day n den later in e aftn head down for an interview at changi. but unfortunately the previous nite on a nite out wif e gerls, i kinda sprained my ankle a bit at esplanade lol. so yea woke up e nx morning n decided ah im too lazy to drag my ass outta bed so early. anw i had yet to do research for e interview so i msged my boss n told her im nt coming in.

later my colleague told me that my boss seemed suspicious cos well my other colleague also happened to be taking off yest. but honestly i didnt reali care haha. i didnt reali regret nt coming to work cos it was nice to take a lil time off. anw so i went for e interview n cos i was already running late, i decided to take a cab n forego public transport.

bleah can u imagine e fare all the way from bt panjang to changi? its not in my nature to go take cabs everywhere unlike some pampered ppl lol. cos im quite stingy wif money issues. anw i didnt get e job cos they wanted someone more experienced. im juz a fresh grad. sheesh couldnt they have already deduced that fact from my resume? made me travel all e way there.
surprisingly though, i wasnt pissed. mayb i am mellowing down a bit n nt follow emotions so much haha.

anw tmr starts e ramadhan month so to all my fellow muslims out there, Selamat Berpuasa! hehe

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 11:45 AM

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rite nw im at work munching on a choc chip cookie haha.to curb the pangs of hunger.come on quick lunch time already.ate rice wif chicken curry in e morning but i guez it wasnt enuf.lucky its a norm in e office for us to munch on stuff as we do our work haha. if not, i tink i will have collapsed in starvation.

actuali now that i tink abt it, rules ard here r pretty lax. i juz found out from my colleague that they dun reali care if ure a lil late to work, as long as u are there.okla mayb not too late but if u reach e office late, den u shd balance it out by staying back late. apart from the snacking in between doing work, sometimes i admit i get bored haha.den i pretend to look bz juz in case my boss sees.

anw in other work-related news, i didnt get the position at MHA. was a lil bummed but e disappointment wasnt too great.i supposed it wasnt meant to be mine. so my job-hunting efforts continues. technically if i were still to be a temp replacement at my current workplc,it shd be till the end of e yr. until the person can come back from her maternity leave nx yr. but initially e letter i got stated till e end of this mth so i must verify if i still have this job nx mth or not haha.

although initially i tot i wanted to leave asap cos its too far for me, i admit i have learnt to adjust to the long arduous journey to n fro and im getting closer to my colleagues. im nt someone who likes change much so i guez being in familiar territory comforts me.

btw later im gonna be stuck in e office juZ wif my boss alone. darnnit. cos one of my colleagues took time off today n the other 2 are gonna leave aft lunch to conduct interviews for the articles they have to write on. im frankly a lil intimidated by my superior cos she got this stern n fierce look abt her. at 1st i tot she didnt like me. i was imagining her tinking to herself 'this temp gerl, how come always leave e office so early?' or 'is she doin work at the back there or is she surfing or chatting?'. haha. bleah den today its juz me n her aft lunch. nt looking forward to it. almost contemplated taking half day but it would look too suspicious lol. anw i dun tink she will allow it seeing as most of her staff will be gone. i doubt she will let me off e hook too.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 11:10 AM

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Apparently my previous post has made someone unhappy.well all i can say is if u dun like wad u read, u can always leave. and juz for e record, i dun eat belacan so i dun tink any is stuck in between my teeth, thank u very much. that's nt to say i dun like malay food. i love malay food. im juz nt very adventurous with food.

And i never said i look down on the Malay lang. In case u failed to read properly, i said 'at times when blh freely ckp melayu, like where im working now, best jugak revert to the old mother tongue'. So im nt quite sure where u derived and assumed that i am against talking in my own bahasa ibunda.

Im sure you dun speak in 100% Malay all the time either.I was juz stating an observation when i remarked that most of youngsters nowadays speak in a mixture of English and Malay nowadays. Alrite i hope i got tt matter cleared up.

Anw im fasting today.got like 2 days more to pay back.Its almost 12 now n im already envisioning food in my mind haha. yesterday i fasted too.woke up late so abt half a day gone heh. den in the aftn took a lil nap so juz had a few more hrs b4 i could buka. now since im at work, there r little reminders like lunchtime later haha. im probably gonna have to starve b4 i can eat a full buka cos when maghrib comes along, i will be stuck in the mrt train with a growling tummy. the consequence of working in a place so freakin far from ur home is the ardous, time-consuming journey back. haiz. oh wells.

kinda reminded me back of my attachment days back in poly. when i was fasting during my internship n of coz it had to be in on the other end of the island, Changi Airport. n i always had to break my fast all alone in the bus tryin to eat without attracting too much attention. at least i can sneak a bite in the bus. i dun tink tts possible on the mrt though.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 11:37 AM

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Just realised everything else abt a guy may be appealing but once u hear his voice on the phone, it's a total letdown. haha

never really tot abt how a guy's voice can be a factor in attraction but after syaz pointed how she cant stand guys wif cepek voices or otherwise known as suara high pitched yg tk sedap didengar, i realized heyyy, it does play a part in how i perceive the guy to be.

A guy may be the most gorgeous specimen of the male species on earth but if his voice is reminiscent of Donald Duck, it's a mood killer. i guez i nvr tot abt it b4 until i did tok to a couple of guys whose voices werent exactly manly haha.

Ok actuali i tot i wanna blog in total Malay but erm i dun tink tt can be achieved lol. i find it so kekok to even tok 100% in Malay. yea im such an exemplary Malay rite? mesti org ckp alamak si dek ni speaking tj habis2, mat saleh celup la ape la.

its a habit la for me to converse in english usually mostly cos i was from a course where majority was made up of chinese so i cant possibly tok to them in mly can i? granted im already out of skl but old habits die hard. but yea at times when blh freely ckp melayu, like at where im workin now, best jugak revert to the old mother tongue. ala i tink most of the mly generation my age now speak in rojak manglish anw.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 12:44 PM

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Let's see wads been goin on in my life...

Wed 30 Aug - went for the interview at NTU. it was surprisingly quite short. they didnt ask too many qns. they didnt even asked for the certs that they initially wanted me to bring when they tok to me on the phone. Dun tink i will get tt job tho so im nt too concerned with it.

Yesterday attended the workshop for the Co-curricular prog exec posn i applied for or CCPE for short. Initially tot it was at SAF Yatch Club at Changi so i was pretty worried that there is no way to get there on public transport. In the end all my anxieties were for nought cos when i called to confirm the place, the person told me it's been changed to Springleaf Tower at Tanjong Pagar. it was a mixture of relief and irritation cos on the one hand, im glad i dun have to travel all the way to the east to a remote ulu place but annoyed that she missed me out when she emailed the rest on the updated info. thank goodness i called to check.

Didnt quite noe wad to expect from the workshop as it was rather long from 9-5. But it turned out to be a pleasant surprise. i had fun interacting and mingling with the other participants. It was actually a workshop cum final selection process for the participants. So i guessed it was like an interview of sorts though not the conventional method. I supposed they assessed us by how we did in the activities and by our responses to the qns they posed to us on the worksheets they handed out at the end of each activity. Ok that was a mouthful haha.

Anywaez, there were ppl from like all walks of life. most were older den me. We were divided into groups and i was the youngest in mine. Actually it was quite interesting to hear from ppl much older and more experienced than u and i did learn a lot thru observing and interacting with them. some gave me advice on hw to survive in the working world, which frankly im quite apprehensive of rite now seeing as im a fresh grad. they told me they take quite a while to look for a job, till abt a yr and the tot scares me. Cos i had only been waiting for like 3 mths until the mendaki gig came along and i was already almost goin nuts with all the waiting. tt was y i jumped at the chance to work at mendaki even tho the distance is waaaaay too far for my liking. but i have to keep myself afloat cos there's no more income from the parental units so there must be some input in my bank acc tt comes from somewhere.

So im nt too sure if i will be selected for this job as a CCPE. after getting to noe more abt the job scope thru the workshop and having a feel of wad it's like to be one thru the various activities, i tink it would be a challenging job. definitely sth that i can learn n grow a lot from. i guez a small part of me is afraid. but i noe i cant let that stop me. if not, hw am i supposed to ever get out of my comfort zone rite? so i guez we'll juz see what happens. MHA still hasnt let me noe their decision on whether i passed that lie detector test haha.

So many uncertainties surrounding my career path rite now...But i noe there's no rush. i got the rest of my life to figure it out. i dun feel the sense of urgency like i did a couple of mths ago. I guessed i have slowly learnt to let go of trying to control some aspects of life that is juz out of ur hands. i wont say im a control freak but i supposed in the past, it bugs me when i cant anticipate or so-called control the things ard me so i get easily annoyed when things dun go as planned. i've learnt to be more open to opportunities and to go with the flow n not be so rigid in my mindset. guez u could say im a pretty stubborn person haha. altho i hoped that im more flexible now as compared to a couple of yrs ago.

[[ beauty is in the eyes of the beholder__ 8:44 AM

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LoveCynic
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